Having children is not easy. But we often talk and see a lot of advice and experience shared when children are smaller, however, is not much about the hurdles we can all face with our older children. One of the more difficult times we can face with our daughters is when they start their first period. Of course, we shouldn’t cast negativity over it, after all, it is a milestone of growing up in your daughter’s life. But at the same time, it can be so hard for your daughter to comprehend the physical and mental changes. So what can you do to help?
It is essential to be aware of how to react and help your daughter when the time comes. While you can’t predict when this is going to happen, what you can do is prepare in terms of how to react, how to help, and how to explain. So here is how to prepare for your teen daughter for their first period.
When will the period start?
You can’t predict exactly when your daughter will start her period, but you can estimate that it is usually between the ages of 11 and 13. It usually appears around two years after there are the first signs of breast development. However, some girls will develop earlier than that, and some even later than 13. So there really is no right or wrong answer and your daughter will develop at her own rate.
How can you discuss it with your daughter?
The best course of action is to openly discuss the changes that your daughter is going to experience with them as soon as you think the time is right. You will know when the time is right to have this conversation. But how can you bring it up? It might be that your child’s school will start the conversation for you. These days they openly discuss these changes in general studies classes. So they may come home with questions that you need to be ready to answer. Or it could be that you want to openly discuss it.
Take time to reflect on how you felt
A great thing to consider is drawing from your own experience. Try and remember how you felt about your first period. Were you informed? Was it a shock? Did you feel supported? Did you feel overwhelmed? Whether it was positive or negative it is a great way to understand how you might have preferred to approach this milestone in your life. It can then help you to move forward and explain to your daughter and handle it more positively.
Be open to the questions she might ask you
There will be questions, no doubt about it, so try and think ahead of what they may be so you can be prepared with how you might answer them. The aim is for your daughter to be informed, to feel positive, and to feel assured about this very natural milestone in their lives. Here are a couple of examples of questions that you might face.
Does it hurt?
One of the big questions might be whether it hurts. When people think about the blood they associate it with pain. But while there can be some pain involved with a period due to abdominal cramps that you can experience as a symptom, the bleeding part of a period doesn’t hurt. So when it comes to this question it would be a good idea to assure your daughter about what pain is possible. Abdominal cramps, headaches, etc can occur during a period but they often don’t last as long as the bleeding. Commonly these things will be around for a few days. Assurance is key with this question.
How often will a period come?
They may also ask how often they will have to experience a period. After all, it isn’t the most pleasant thing to go through. Of course, we know that it will take place on average every 28 days.
What else to expect
There are a number of different factors to expect when it comes to a period. As someone who will have experienced them many times before you are the best person to explain how it has felt for you. Discuss some of the symptoms you might have experienced such as cramps, low energy, bloating, and mood changes. You can reassure your daughter that all of these things are normal. You might want to explain the different symptoms whether you experienced them or not, just in case a period is different for your daughter. You should also explain that flow might be different. It could be heavy or light, and it can be interchangeable as their body develops a routine. The main thing is to have that open conversation so that they feel comfortable with talking to you about it in the future and to help them realise that this is a completely normal and natural thing to go through. Even if it doesn’t feel like it at the time.
Advice on the different ways to handle a period
When it comes to handling a period we will all have our own ways of dealing with it. Commonly for your daughter, you might want to encourage something like sanitary pads pr period underwear to give them that level of protection. You may use tampons regularly or other forms of protection like a menstrual cup but these sorts of things tend to come as an option of choice later on.
Sanctuary pads are one of the easiest ways for your daughter to feel protected. They can have spare ones with them for when they need to change, and most schools will have a collection of sanitary items on hand for when those emergencies and appearances strike when they are not expecting them.
Create a period kit in advance for when it arrives
Finally, in advance of your daughter starting a period you could create a period kit. Inside you could have sanitary products, a hot water bottle for period pain, some paracetamol, and even things like chocolate and pampering items to make them feel better. You can also buy period kits online from platforms like Amazon or Etsy.
Hopefully, this will help you and your daughter to be prepared for their first period.